The Greatest Movie Ever: Showdown in Little Tokyo

Was at Walmart a week ago and picked up one of those 4 in one movie packs, where they package bad movies from the 80's that no one would buy unless they were getting a 4 for 1 deal.  Few nights ago after a shift and a few beers I popped in the first movie of the set and turns out it, it's the best movie ever made.  The name of the movie was Showdown in Little Tokyo.

 

This is the greatest movie ever made.  Usually a movie is made great by terrific performances, superior directing and editing, and an epic plot but Showdown in Little Tokyo goes a different route - its so bad it's awesome.  Sure Dolph Lundgren sounds silly when he speaks Japanese,  Brandon Lee could act like my old deaf roommate can sing, and the fight scenes look like the we choreographed by some mullet clad martial artist who films self defense tapes in his mom's basement - but who cares, it's freakin' great.  Dolph Lundgren jumps over a car and later turns one on it's side to use as a shield.  Tia Carrere gets naked and they use an even hotter body double for all the shots.  Splinter's side kick from the first ninja turtle move is in it, need  I say more. 

It's also got some of the best lines in a movie ever.  Just a few examples.  Don't worry about the set up to these lines, their irrelevant.

Dolph Lundgren: "Roughly translated, out of the frying pan and boned up the ass with a red-hot poker."

Brandon Lee: "Kenner, just incase we get killed, I wanted to tell you that you have the biggest dick I've ever seen on a man."

Brandon Lee: "We're going to nail this guy. And when we get done, we're going to go eat fish off those naked chicks! "

There are so many more, it's awesome.  How I never saw this movie till now I don't know.  Go out and buy it and love it.  Best worst movie ever.