Found this story on msn.com. An inmate in Orange County, out of concern for his diet tried, to get something different than the usual salami meal. Unfortunately for the inmate, kosher meals are reserved for inmates with religous reasons for not eating the standard prison meal. He complained and when brought before a judge his lawyer cited Festivus - a holiday created by Frank Costanza from Seinfeld. It worked too for a little bit, the inmate got kosher meals for 2 months before the county had the order thrown out. You can read the rest of the story here
And if you'd like to learn about the wonderful holiday of Festivus watch this:
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Back?
Yep I'm back. Shouldn't have been gone in the first place but I got a bit lazy and busy at the same time. Doesn't mix too well.
Things are relatively good. I sold my digital camera on Ebay. As much as I wanted to film my product review for the powerband I just couldn't justify having a camera I never used that I paid a decent amount for when I have bills to pay. Using that money and additional money made bartending I've put a decent chunk of cash into the company to repay what I owe in addition to paying our lawyer off and an employee who the business owed. Getting rid of debt feels good! Only another another $270,000 and I'll have the business and personal debts cleared. Some of that the business itself will take care of hopefully. Between the lawyer, accountant, employee debt owed and what I owe the business I've paid off close to 4k in the last 3 months. I've also paid off a bit on some personal credit cards. If I can keep doing this for 5 years I'll be set. That's a bit depressing...
I also quit drinking almost a month ago, quit soda the week after, and finally red bull the week after that. I'm just too busy right now to feel even a little hungover even once a week. And honestly I don't enjoy beer or even whiskey enough just to drink one with dinner so if I'm not going to be having a few and good time, I dont' see a reason to do it at all. After quitting all 3 I do feel a little better. Even when I'm beat I'm not quite as exhausted as I usually am. As a bar owner though I'd encourage everyone around Fort Collins to come buy soda/red bull/alcohol or some mixture of any two at Hodi's...I got bills to pay!
I started working out again too last week and have been to the gym 4 times in the last week. It's been pretty pathetic but I do swell up pretty quick so at least I'll look better pretty quick. I can't come close to doing what I use to though. Guess it'll take some time.
Got my tax refund last month and it was the biggest I'd ever gotten - $1100. Gave me a bit of breathing room. Got me thinking about how I need to get a bit of bump here and there to get a head. As much as I've paid off in the last few months there is still a lot more I could paying off and things are tight enough already. I need to figure out how to make another $30 a day or $1000/month. As is, I could spend the next 3-5 years doing what I'm doing and end up at zero by the end of things which would be nice to some extent but I don't want to be 32 and at zero. Compound interest tends to add up, the time to start saving was now/5 years ago.
So I got pile of debt, not entirely sure my floor at bar will last another few years, and I'm working all the time but I'm paying stuff off, getting healthy, and tomorrow is Thanksgiving which is one of two days during the entire year no one can ask me anything about work. I can go an entire day without having my phone on and everything won't go to shit. I'm spending the day by myself cleaning the house and playing video games. The dogs and I will split a small turkey it'll be great. Is that sad I'm looking forward to this? I don't think it is, like I mentioned previously I have 2 days a year where I won't get a work related phone call.
Just a warning - anyone calls about business tomorrow just to spite me - I will kill you. Slowly.
And finally for your enjoyment - the hottest workout video girl ever
Things are relatively good. I sold my digital camera on Ebay. As much as I wanted to film my product review for the powerband I just couldn't justify having a camera I never used that I paid a decent amount for when I have bills to pay. Using that money and additional money made bartending I've put a decent chunk of cash into the company to repay what I owe in addition to paying our lawyer off and an employee who the business owed. Getting rid of debt feels good! Only another another $270,000 and I'll have the business and personal debts cleared. Some of that the business itself will take care of hopefully. Between the lawyer, accountant, employee debt owed and what I owe the business I've paid off close to 4k in the last 3 months. I've also paid off a bit on some personal credit cards. If I can keep doing this for 5 years I'll be set. That's a bit depressing...
I also quit drinking almost a month ago, quit soda the week after, and finally red bull the week after that. I'm just too busy right now to feel even a little hungover even once a week. And honestly I don't enjoy beer or even whiskey enough just to drink one with dinner so if I'm not going to be having a few and good time, I dont' see a reason to do it at all. After quitting all 3 I do feel a little better. Even when I'm beat I'm not quite as exhausted as I usually am. As a bar owner though I'd encourage everyone around Fort Collins to come buy soda/red bull/alcohol or some mixture of any two at Hodi's...I got bills to pay!
I started working out again too last week and have been to the gym 4 times in the last week. It's been pretty pathetic but I do swell up pretty quick so at least I'll look better pretty quick. I can't come close to doing what I use to though. Guess it'll take some time.
Got my tax refund last month and it was the biggest I'd ever gotten - $1100. Gave me a bit of breathing room. Got me thinking about how I need to get a bit of bump here and there to get a head. As much as I've paid off in the last few months there is still a lot more I could paying off and things are tight enough already. I need to figure out how to make another $30 a day or $1000/month. As is, I could spend the next 3-5 years doing what I'm doing and end up at zero by the end of things which would be nice to some extent but I don't want to be 32 and at zero. Compound interest tends to add up, the time to start saving was now/5 years ago.
So I got pile of debt, not entirely sure my floor at bar will last another few years, and I'm working all the time but I'm paying stuff off, getting healthy, and tomorrow is Thanksgiving which is one of two days during the entire year no one can ask me anything about work. I can go an entire day without having my phone on and everything won't go to shit. I'm spending the day by myself cleaning the house and playing video games. The dogs and I will split a small turkey it'll be great. Is that sad I'm looking forward to this? I don't think it is, like I mentioned previously I have 2 days a year where I won't get a work related phone call.
Just a warning - anyone calls about business tomorrow just to spite me - I will kill you. Slowly.
And finally for your enjoyment - the hottest workout video girl ever
Monday, September 6, 2010
Cross Dressing and an Ugly Burn - My most disgusting blog to date
Last Sunday a buddy came back to town and stopped by my house to pick up his motorcyle I been holding for him. It needed a little work so a friend of his asked me to tilt the bike back. I didn't know it'd been running for a bit and put the exhaust right up against my shin. Not a pleasant feeling. It created a huge blister that didn't look too bad till it popped. This is it 2 days after
On a happier note - Japanese Ping Pong
I shaved around the blister and kept it clean and covered for a few days and it's finally starting to get better. It was almost a blessing in disguise. The first few days after I burned myself I'd wake up and redress my bandage and before I'd wrap it up I'd throw some hydrogen peroxide on it and I'd wake up pretty damn quick after. Must be like what coffee does to some people minus the burning sensation.
Going from gross to absolutely disgusting Tour de Fat was this weekend, which meant both my roommate and friend had to dress in drag, drink a lot and ride bikes around now. A farmer's tan is bad - a tan from wearing a dress and bra is much worse. And of course, being guys with stuffed bra's they did exactly what guys with boobs would do - molest the crap out of themselves. It just goes to show when given the chance a straight man cannot resist grabbing a a boob.
No Power Balance Video review yet due to too much work. Soon though. I may spend the extra time and do a bit more research.
Jujitsu class at CSU is going very well. Small class but good students and I have access to the weight room and facilities any day I have class for the entire day. Unfortunately the pool, sauna, and hot tub won't be ready till after spring break next year.
Back to bartending 5 nights a week. Should be good, I'll be able to pay off my debts to the company and whatever personal debt I have too. It's a lot of work and I did 20 hours in two days last week but it's what it takes. Shit needs to get done and done right one way or the other. Not always fun.
On a happier note - Japanese Ping Pong
Monday, August 23, 2010
Amazing catches and riots
Before I run off and do inventory and whatever else I need to for work here's a few amazing catches from some Japanese baseball games that happened this summer. Yahoo Sport labeled this "The most amazing catch we'll see this season"
EMBED-Spiderman Style Baseball Catch - Watch more free videos
Then this happened a few weeks later.
Of course if you were actually at the stadium you'd discover that the wall is only 3ft high. They're a short people.
Finally here's a link to some videos from this weekends New West Fest riots. Nothing special I was hoping to see some more aggressive baton use on some stupid people.
Lots to do today, little time to do it.
EMBED-Spiderman Style Baseball Catch - Watch more free videos
Then this happened a few weeks later.
Of course if you were actually at the stadium you'd discover that the wall is only 3ft high. They're a short people.
Finally here's a link to some videos from this weekends New West Fest riots. Nothing special I was hoping to see some more aggressive baton use on some stupid people.
Lots to do today, little time to do it.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Kids these days
Tonight we had a private party at Hodi's for a girl's 21st birthday. Worked out pretty well till the end when all the drunk college kids started acting like drunk college kids. All kinds of fun. Turns out though we had a fairly well behaved crowd compared to the rest of Old Town. This weekend is New West Fest in Fort Collins and the first night and today seemed to go well. Big crowds in old town, live music, vendors, big affair. Became a much bigger affair toward the end of the night. Saw a lot of cops south of Hodi's. Had heard some guy got stabbed. Some how it became a riot and we could see the tear gas from Hodi's. Heard something about chairs or people being thrown through shop windows. By the time Travis was changing the marque the cops had cordoned off Old Town and were walking down College Ave in a line wearing riot gear carrying tear gas and paintball guns pushing people out of area.
What the hell is wrong with people? How many people really need tear gas shot at them to decide to behave? Too many stupid people I guess. Wherever i retire I'll have to make sure to go somewhere far away from stupid people.
What the hell is wrong with people? How many people really need tear gas shot at them to decide to behave? Too many stupid people I guess. Wherever i retire I'll have to make sure to go somewhere far away from stupid people.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Oh the Power!
Got my Power Balance Wristbands in the mail a few days ago but didn't open it till tonight.
Included with the two wristbands I ordered there was a small pamplet that gave a bit of useless information about the wristbands - you could wear your Power Balance wristband in water, all day, and as long as the Power Balance product is within 1-3 inches of your skin it'll work even if it's not contacting you.
Somehow I managed to stretch the magic unicorn braclet onto one of my massive wrist. It's not uncomfortable. I tried to pick up my jeep after putting it on to little avail so while it might increase strength and flexibility it doesn't bestow any super powers to the wearer. I might experiment later by putting the other wristband on my left wrist and maybe with the two combined powers I can bench press a jeep. Or I might just see if it'll help my stomach become more flexible when I eat a sleeve of Oreos.
You can't see in the picture but there are two holograms on the wristband, one on each side. The hologram is small and very similar to what you see on some I.D. cards. Besides the Power Balance logo the holograms also say "Authentic" which strangely enough along with "Genuine" and "Secure" are all words that if I were to see on a drivers license or State identification card I would know immediately that the license/identification card was fake - it's one of the first things you learn in an I.D class. Probably just a weird coincidence I'm sure...
Hoping to shoot our Power Balance product test this weekend. If not maybe Monday or Tuesday.
I've been working out here and there and not as much as I intended but I did my 150 finger pushups tonight. I did 3 sets of 20 followed by 3 sets of 30 and also did 50 cuts with my wooden sword (each side) and 50 squats. I just might be in decent shape for my 3rd degree test in October.
More Power Balance trash talk and shirtless pictures to come I'm sure.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Power Balance - Holographs with Power!
Money is tight right now but there was one particular item I just had to have - 2 Power Balance wristband.. What is Power Balance? Well according to their website:
"...Power Balance is Performance Technology designed to work with your body’s natural energy field. Founded by athletes, Power Balance is a favorite among elite athletes for whom balance, strength and flexibility are important.
Power Balance is based on the idea of optimizing the body’s natural energy flow, similar to concepts behind many Eastern philosophies. The hologram in Power Balance is designed to resonate with and respond to the natural energy field of the body..."
So in a word - Bullshit. Power Balance supposedly accomplishes this by implanting holograms on wristbands and pendants. The wristbands come in silicon and neoprene and run about $30 and the pendants go for as much as $79.95. Beyond the above quote from the website there is nothing on the website explaining the science or theory behind the wristbands. The demo videos are terribly bad, so bad you think it's a joke. Follow this link to watch them. In all three videos the salesman has whichever "elite" athlete pose in a position and the salesman then applies pressure at specific part of their body to off balance the athlete. The salesman then puts the Power Balance wristband on the athlete and performs the test again to show how much better their balance is while wearing the bracelet. Wait...actually that last part doesn't happen. The salesman puts the wristband on the athlete and we never see the results. The video just cuts to another athlete and the same thing happens - balance test, wristband applied, no follow up test. It's as if I came up with a wristband and claimed it could make you work on water. I then demonstrated that I could not walk on water by trying to run across a pool. After I come out of the pool soaking wet I say "now lets see what happens when I put on my wristband" and then I go home and eat cookies. Basically same thing.
Remember when you were 6 and certain toys, rocks, common house hold things gave you super powers like the spatuala or whatever that made you invisible? Or the pillows from your bed that you threw on the floor and then walked on because the floor was lava? But the floor really wasn't lava and the pillows weren't really nice cool rocks. I had a prism that did something amazing but I can't remember what exactly it was - you get the idea. Now imagine an adult who still thinks shit still works like that - you can grab an object come up with a story for it and it imbues you withmagical powers I mean better balance and strength and you have the Power Balance.
God Damnit Boulder! Haven't you done enough? Well turns out this didn't come from Boulder it came from that magical place called California. Laguana Niguel to be exact. I've been there, my girlfriend has family there. I guess we should just be glad there is a business trying to make money in California - the government needs the tax revenue.
A sales rep from Power Balance tried to sell my Jujitsu instructors class on these things. Apparently they aren't helpful when it comes to joint locks because when you touch someone wearing a Power Balance wristband the benefits of the wristband transfer to whoever you're touching. If this is the case I really should have ordered five and myself and 5 friends could put on our wristbands, link up, and summon Captain Planet to fight environmental injustice. Am I the only one who absolutely hates Captain Planet? Who on God's slightly-less-green-because-of-evil-polluting-corporations-earth thought a show revolving around 5 politically correct stereotypical characters who use magic rings to summon a blue guy to fight villains who like to pollute was a good idea? If only they had Power Balance wristbands we could have defeated global warming and capitalism ten years ago. And maybe the show wouldn't have sucked so much. But I digress...I was the kid who hated G.I. Joe too because the bad guys always had time to run away from their vehicles before a missile hit it. Did anyone ever die in that show? Now Transformers, there was a show! And the animated 1984 movie blew was a hell of a lot better than the live action crap that Michael Bay directed. Don't even get me started there...
Anyhoo, why buy 2 power balance wristbands? Well we got some product testing to do next Sunday, I'll have the video posted by the following Monday. I'm designing a number of obstacle course and other test to determine if Power Balance really does improve strength and balance. Should be a lot of fun. Product testing usually is fun especially in the bar industry because your product is boozes. I've learned from my years of experience testing various whiskeys and such product testing requires alcohol to really get good results. I don't see why next Sunday's test should be any different....
I remain
Power Balance is based on the idea of optimizing the body’s natural energy flow, similar to concepts behind many Eastern philosophies. The hologram in Power Balance is designed to resonate with and respond to the natural energy field of the body..."
So in a word - Bullshit. Power Balance supposedly accomplishes this by implanting holograms on wristbands and pendants. The wristbands come in silicon and neoprene and run about $30 and the pendants go for as much as $79.95. Beyond the above quote from the website there is nothing on the website explaining the science or theory behind the wristbands. The demo videos are terribly bad, so bad you think it's a joke. Follow this link to watch them. In all three videos the salesman has whichever "elite" athlete pose in a position and the salesman then applies pressure at specific part of their body to off balance the athlete. The salesman then puts the Power Balance wristband on the athlete and performs the test again to show how much better their balance is while wearing the bracelet. Wait...actually that last part doesn't happen. The salesman puts the wristband on the athlete and we never see the results. The video just cuts to another athlete and the same thing happens - balance test, wristband applied, no follow up test. It's as if I came up with a wristband and claimed it could make you work on water. I then demonstrated that I could not walk on water by trying to run across a pool. After I come out of the pool soaking wet I say "now lets see what happens when I put on my wristband" and then I go home and eat cookies. Basically same thing.
Remember when you were 6 and certain toys, rocks, common house hold things gave you super powers like the spatuala or whatever that made you invisible? Or the pillows from your bed that you threw on the floor and then walked on because the floor was lava? But the floor really wasn't lava and the pillows weren't really nice cool rocks. I had a prism that did something amazing but I can't remember what exactly it was - you get the idea. Now imagine an adult who still thinks shit still works like that - you can grab an object come up with a story for it and it imbues you with
God Damnit Boulder! Haven't you done enough? Well turns out this didn't come from Boulder it came from that magical place called California. Laguana Niguel to be exact. I've been there, my girlfriend has family there. I guess we should just be glad there is a business trying to make money in California - the government needs the tax revenue.
A sales rep from Power Balance tried to sell my Jujitsu instructors class on these things. Apparently they aren't helpful when it comes to joint locks because when you touch someone wearing a Power Balance wristband the benefits of the wristband transfer to whoever you're touching. If this is the case I really should have ordered five and myself and 5 friends could put on our wristbands, link up, and summon Captain Planet to fight environmental injustice. Am I the only one who absolutely hates Captain Planet? Who on God's slightly-less-green-because-of-evil-polluting-corporations-earth thought a show revolving around 5 politically correct stereotypical characters who use magic rings to summon a blue guy to fight villains who like to pollute was a good idea? If only they had Power Balance wristbands we could have defeated global warming and capitalism ten years ago. And maybe the show wouldn't have sucked so much. But I digress...I was the kid who hated G.I. Joe too because the bad guys always had time to run away from their vehicles before a missile hit it. Did anyone ever die in that show? Now Transformers, there was a show! And the animated 1984 movie blew was a hell of a lot better than the live action crap that Michael Bay directed. Don't even get me started there...
Anyhoo, why buy 2 power balance wristbands? Well we got some product testing to do next Sunday, I'll have the video posted by the following Monday. I'm designing a number of obstacle course and other test to determine if Power Balance really does improve strength and balance. Should be a lot of fun. Product testing usually is fun especially in the bar industry because your product is boozes. I've learned from my years of experience testing various whiskeys and such product testing requires alcohol to really get good results. I don't see why next Sunday's test should be any different....
I remain
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Bitching Band and the Blind Leading the Blind
We had a pretty terrible night at the bar. A band who will remain unnamed came through and we had 15 people paid and the worst bar night in probably 2-3 months. The music wasn't terrible and the opener, Key Of Joy was great but the headliner thought it would be good to charge $15 and start the show at 8. We were done at 11 (We make most of our money between 11 - 130) and we had 15ish people paid. The band was bit older (Mid 40's I'm guessing) and assumed everyone went to bed at the same time they did. Doesn't work that way though at least in Fort Collins. It's a late crowd and no one but a few of their friends would drop $15 bucks on them.
I made the mistake of telling a band member she couldn't take a bunch of friends/family backstage at the end of the night. Didn't make her too happy. She made sure to come up later and ask me "what's your name?" She meant to say "What the hell is your name prick I need to tell your boss you pissed me off." I had to bite my tongue while she told me how pissed off she was and how that had never happened in her professional career, yadda, yadda, yadda...
I was polite and ended up walking away because she wasn't getting any nicer. If only we'd had the show in the green room, apparently they could pack that. It'd free up the stage too so I could make real money off a real crowd and pay my very, very real rent. Bombing the Friday before rent is due is painful.
The rest of the band was very polite and nice though. They even let my blind friend who is visiting from Japan check out their drum set. Dai is here from Tokyo with his mother. A mutual friend put us in touch so I could work on my Japanese and he could practice his English. I've taken him to a baseball game, hiking, tubing, and even for a bike ride. It's been cool, tubing down the Poudre was fun but a bit dangerous. Trying to steer two tubes tied together while trying to remember the japanese phrase for "very big right straight ahead - put your feet up!" was a bit difficult. But the whole thing was a lot of fun too. The water is cold and hitting the occasional rock hurts but not enough to make me not want to do it again. In fact I did it this afternoon.
The whole thing has been pretty good for me, being able to practice Japanese has been great. It's been difficult not being able to gesture though. You tend to take vision for granted and I when I started explaining what Hooters was after we drove by one I forgot that Dai couldn't see it. So for all he knew I just decided to spend five minutes trying to explain in broken Japanese that there was a famous American restaurant with bad food and girls in tight little outfits. The baseball game was fun though, I got the tickets from a friend before I found out Dai was blind. "Ball", "Strike", "out" are pretty easy to translate though, thankfully.
I made the mistake of telling a band member she couldn't take a bunch of friends/family backstage at the end of the night. Didn't make her too happy. She made sure to come up later and ask me "what's your name?" She meant to say "What the hell is your name prick I need to tell your boss you pissed me off." I had to bite my tongue while she told me how pissed off she was and how that had never happened in her professional career, yadda, yadda, yadda...
I was polite and ended up walking away because she wasn't getting any nicer. If only we'd had the show in the green room, apparently they could pack that. It'd free up the stage too so I could make real money off a real crowd and pay my very, very real rent. Bombing the Friday before rent is due is painful.
The rest of the band was very polite and nice though. They even let my blind friend who is visiting from Japan check out their drum set. Dai is here from Tokyo with his mother. A mutual friend put us in touch so I could work on my Japanese and he could practice his English. I've taken him to a baseball game, hiking, tubing, and even for a bike ride. It's been cool, tubing down the Poudre was fun but a bit dangerous. Trying to steer two tubes tied together while trying to remember the japanese phrase for "very big right straight ahead - put your feet up!" was a bit difficult. But the whole thing was a lot of fun too. The water is cold and hitting the occasional rock hurts but not enough to make me not want to do it again. In fact I did it this afternoon.
The whole thing has been pretty good for me, being able to practice Japanese has been great. It's been difficult not being able to gesture though. You tend to take vision for granted and I when I started explaining what Hooters was after we drove by one I forgot that Dai couldn't see it. So for all he knew I just decided to spend five minutes trying to explain in broken Japanese that there was a famous American restaurant with bad food and girls in tight little outfits. The baseball game was fun though, I got the tickets from a friend before I found out Dai was blind. "Ball", "Strike", "out" are pretty easy to translate though, thankfully.
The players were so close I probably could spit on them. But why spit on the Rockies? Poor guys will never win a World Series. It's like heckling the Chicago Cubs. Haven't they suffered enough?
Couldn't sleep a few days ago so I grabbed my wooden sword and took a bunch of cuts, hit my punching bad, did some push ups and pull ups, and hit my tire with a sledgehammer. I spent the next two days with incredibly sore forearms and biceps. Took a bit of work to raise my whiskey coke to my lips the following night but apparently the repeated motion caused my muscles to loosen up a bit. Today was the first day I didn't have any pain in my arms. Time to do it all over again.
I think I've figured out why sword work is important to Jujutsu. I have a theory but I'm going to have to swing a sword daily for the next 5 - 10 years. Will elaborate and explain after I've confirmed my theories. Give me a decade. Give or take 10 years. Probably give.
Becca officially moved in as of July 27th. Strangely enough all her clothes wouldn't fit in my closet. It is nice that now I don't have to send her a text telling her to make me a sandwich. I can just yell it at her. Of course now she's close enough to throw things at me when I tell her to make me sandwich. Big heavy things that aren't sandwiches.....On the plus side her bed has a much firmer mattress. My back feels great, or would had I not, only a hundred feet from our exit point on the Poudre, hit a large rock with my hip.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Back!
So I haven't been blogging as of late, partially because I've been busy and partially because when I wasn't busy I didn't feel like doing anything. But it's back to the grindstone today. Few product reviews coming in the next day, got a video in the works, and I'll be updating my progress on a number of fronts in the next few weeks. Off to work but I'll be back tonight.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
She was he?
New Riders of the Purple Sage played Hodi's last night. Was a pretty decent night but there was one incident that left me feeling bit bad. Early in the night I see this old rather large lady with a purse walking backstage. I think to myself "damn old people, always think they can go wherever they please" and ran after her. I say "ma'am, excuse me ma'am...Hey MA'AM." She finally turned around and she was not she, she was a he! He who was in the New Riders and played keyboard. I immediatiely apologized and retreated to my office.
I felt really bad but thinking back to it, the whole thing wasn't really my fault. The band didn't want backstage wristbands so I had no idea he/she was a band member and on top of that from a distance on a dark dance floor, an old man with longer than average hair, saggy breast, and a man purse really looks like a woman.
So I was embarassed but the band played a good show and the tour manager was all smiles and hugs at the end of the night. All well that ends well I guess. But guys, do a few push ups now and then so some kid doesn't mistake you for having boobs when your 67. And don't walk around with a purse....
I felt really bad but thinking back to it, the whole thing wasn't really my fault. The band didn't want backstage wristbands so I had no idea he/she was a band member and on top of that from a distance on a dark dance floor, an old man with longer than average hair, saggy breast, and a man purse really looks like a woman.
So I was embarassed but the band played a good show and the tour manager was all smiles and hugs at the end of the night. All well that ends well I guess. But guys, do a few push ups now and then so some kid doesn't mistake you for having boobs when your 67. And don't walk around with a purse....
Thursday, June 10, 2010
What to do...What to do...I got it! Protest the oil spill! Also featuring hottest workout girl ever
One of my favorite authors, P.J O'Rourke described a conversation with a friend a long time ago in which the friend notes that when the left gets up in arms they go protest and when the right has a beef they don't really do much. Why is that so? "We all have jobs," replied O'Rourke. Recent Tea Party activity has made that statement to some extend less true but given all the old retired people I've seen at the local rallies it's not entirely false.
Regardless, I thought of that exchange between O'Rourke and his liberal friend yesterday while driving down College Ave after I spotted a decent sized protest at a street corner in a sporting goods store parking lot. They were protesting BP. The whole affair was pretty damn silly. For starters, it didn't accomplish a damn thing other than give the protesters a very lame reason to feel good about themselves - they were doing something! Which was on a very technical level, very true. They were also breathing, sweating (it was very hot out), and standing. Surprisingly, none of these actions did anything to clean up the gulf coast or stop the oil leak.
Besides the big anti-oil company sign that was tied to a large, old, gas guzzling truck the other thing I found odd was the sign that said "Honk if you want a clean ocean!" The sign wasn't really strange, what was strange was who actually honked. Immediately after seeing that sign I heard the car next to me honk. I looked, and I kid you not - it was a Ford Expedition. It was as if this driver meant to say "hey quit spilling that oil in the ocean - put it in my tank. I'm just burning through this shit!"
I also loved the stereotypical college kid in a tie dye shirt at the end of the protest line. It brought to memory another great quote from P.J O'Rourke:
Regardless, I thought of that exchange between O'Rourke and his liberal friend yesterday while driving down College Ave after I spotted a decent sized protest at a street corner in a sporting goods store parking lot. They were protesting BP. The whole affair was pretty damn silly. For starters, it didn't accomplish a damn thing other than give the protesters a very lame reason to feel good about themselves - they were doing something! Which was on a very technical level, very true. They were also breathing, sweating (it was very hot out), and standing. Surprisingly, none of these actions did anything to clean up the gulf coast or stop the oil leak.
Besides the big anti-oil company sign that was tied to a large, old, gas guzzling truck the other thing I found odd was the sign that said "Honk if you want a clean ocean!" The sign wasn't really strange, what was strange was who actually honked. Immediately after seeing that sign I heard the car next to me honk. I looked, and I kid you not - it was a Ford Expedition. It was as if this driver meant to say "hey quit spilling that oil in the ocean - put it in my tank. I'm just burning through this shit!"
I also loved the stereotypical college kid in a tie dye shirt at the end of the protest line. It brought to memory another great quote from P.J O'Rourke:
"Earnestness is stupidity sent to college."
Not that all protest and protesters are stupid. The Civil Rights protest in the 60's actually got something done.
Charlton Heston - A crazy gun toting conservative who didn't hate minorities?
The difference between the Civil Rights movement and the hippies protesting BP in Fort Collins is that the Civil Rights movement went to places where what they were protesting was happening. White only restaurants, stores, Washington D.C, and let the people there know they weren't going to take it. They actually got something accomplished too. Protesting in Fort Collins isn't quiet the same thing and as I stated earlier is really just a way to feel for the protesters to feel better about themselves. It's a form of masturbation. A much more useful thing to do would be to actually hop on a bus and go to the affected areas and volunteer to help clean up the mess. Maybe clean up some pelicans or other wildlife. Or send money to clean up operations or groups that help people in the region negatively affected by the spill.
Now I haven't done any of these things, but I'm not standing around with a stupid sign either so I can feel good about myself. And really thats my only beef with this whole protest thing. If you really have a cause you want to contribute to or stand up for, find some useful way to help. If it's politics, become as informed as you can, write your representative, vote, or run for office. If it's oil spills, help clean it up or go without smoking a bowl for a day and donate a few dollars. Whatever you do, don't stand around like an idiot on the corner of Mulberry and College on a hot day so you can pat yourself on the back and say you made a difference because you didn't.
On a lighter note, today's video of the week: The hottest workout girl ever
Friday, May 28, 2010
Just a little off the top
I hate having too much hair. This won't ever be a problem when bad genetics along with stress from the bar cause me to go bald in 5 (hopefully I have that long) years. But while I still do have hair it drives me crazy when it's too long. So was the case Wednesday I was driving home feeling my hair and yearning for a haircut. I didn't want to spend any money on a barber so when I got home I grabbed my roommates haircut kit and started buzzing hair off. It looked a bit uneven so I went a bit shorter and this is what resulted:
So it's a bit short. But it feels great to touch. I've been rubbing my head for the last two days like a teenager who stumbled upon his dad's dirty magazine collection. And I'm so much cooler too, I was walking round the bar today and those ceiling fans kept my scalp at a cool comfortable temperature! I understand it's not the best look in the world for me but it keeps me cool, it's easy to maintain and no one can tell that when I'm late for a meeting its cause I just woke up.
Course I'm picking up the woman from the airport today, she'll look suprised - the kind of suprised look that says, "I can't believe you did that it looks terrible but I kinda love you so I'll tolerate it and hope it grows back quick." She's been with me too long to leave me because I became goofy looking. That's how I got away with growing a goatee. That's also how she's going to get away with getting fat in a few years. She'll give me that lame "I'm gaining weight cause I'm pregnant" line but by that point we'll have been together long enough I'm beyond caring and I'll start stashing dirty magazines in my closet, which my kid will find years later. It's a the natural way of life, all things come full circle.
Strangest thing of the week I've seen so far
Course I'm picking up the woman from the airport today, she'll look suprised - the kind of suprised look that says, "I can't believe you did that it looks terrible but I kinda love you so I'll tolerate it and hope it grows back quick." She's been with me too long to leave me because I became goofy looking. That's how I got away with growing a goatee. That's also how she's going to get away with getting fat in a few years. She'll give me that lame "I'm gaining weight cause I'm pregnant" line but by that point we'll have been together long enough I'm beyond caring and I'll start stashing dirty magazines in my closet, which my kid will find years later. It's a the natural way of life, all things come full circle.
Strangest thing of the week I've seen so far
It's like some big liberal metaphor - a big, slow inefficient piece of equipemnt that requires way too many people to function, but that you can feel good about because you're working together with a bunch of people who aren't in a hurry to get shit done. And it's green!
And finally I saw this video on TV and had to share
Ah kittens...
I remain
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Yep it's really true...that's Boulder for you
I should subscribe to the Boulder Daily Camera. So many incredibly stupid mishaps happen in this town. It's like reading the Onion if it were 100% true, not exaggerated in anyway yet still strange as all hell. This is a town where bomb scares are caused by misplaced hippie crystals. Yes, Boulder really is home to some of the most stupid yet somehow functional people in the known free world.
I say functional because these people can apparently build working booby traps. In fact these people are so adept at building booby traps that booby traps had to be banned within the city limits of Boulder.
Ban booby traps? How did this even become an issue, it doesn't even make sense?
It doesn't make sense of course because it's Boulder - well until you read this article from the Boulder Daily Camera and suddenly it makes total sense, for Boulder at least. You see, Boulder's ban on booby traps started as part of a new set of regulations for medical marijuana dispensaries.
And suddenly everything comes together...booby traps to protect pot! The only part that's still confusing is how a bunch of stoned hippies could sit still long enough to make a functional booby trap without collapsing into a helpless fit of drug induced laughter half way through the process at the the thought of building something that had the word "booby" as part of it's name, only to finally quit laughing and get up the floor after the urge to eat the last remaining crumbs and fragments of Doritos
left in the bag could no longer be ignored. That last sentence was way too long, but it's entirely true.
After doing a bit more research there is no evidence that anyone has built any booby traps at dispensaries or homes in Boulder. In fact even the police chief in Boulder has never heard of a booby traps being used in Boulder. The whole thing only came up because someone got the wild and crazy idea that dispensary owners would rather fashion some strange Home Alone inspired traps than pay for a decent security system seeing as they're having such a hard time making any money selling pot to a town full of rich trust fund kids pretending to be hippies. Much better and cheaper to rig a blowtorch to burn some greedy bastards hair off after he kicks open the back door than invest in heavy doors, strong locks, and a home security system. As a business owner myself I can tell you there really aren't any liability issues if someone has their face burnt off while trying to break into your establishment.
These people must be high...
I say functional because these people can apparently build working booby traps. In fact these people are so adept at building booby traps that booby traps had to be banned within the city limits of Boulder.
Ban booby traps? How did this even become an issue, it doesn't even make sense?
It doesn't make sense of course because it's Boulder - well until you read this article from the Boulder Daily Camera and suddenly it makes total sense, for Boulder at least. You see, Boulder's ban on booby traps started as part of a new set of regulations for medical marijuana dispensaries.
And suddenly everything comes together...booby traps to protect pot! The only part that's still confusing is how a bunch of stoned hippies could sit still long enough to make a functional booby trap without collapsing into a helpless fit of drug induced laughter half way through the process at the the thought of building something that had the word "booby" as part of it's name, only to finally quit laughing and get up the floor after the urge to eat the last remaining crumbs and fragments of Doritos
left in the bag could no longer be ignored. That last sentence was way too long, but it's entirely true. After doing a bit more research there is no evidence that anyone has built any booby traps at dispensaries or homes in Boulder. In fact even the police chief in Boulder has never heard of a booby traps being used in Boulder. The whole thing only came up because someone got the wild and crazy idea that dispensary owners would rather fashion some strange Home Alone inspired traps than pay for a decent security system seeing as they're having such a hard time making any money selling pot to a town full of rich trust fund kids pretending to be hippies. Much better and cheaper to rig a blowtorch to burn some greedy bastards hair off after he kicks open the back door than invest in heavy doors, strong locks, and a home security system. As a business owner myself I can tell you there really aren't any liability issues if someone has their face burnt off while trying to break into your establishment.
These people must be high...
Friday, May 14, 2010
Free 20ft tall tree - bring shovel and crook gets shot in the genitals
Craigslist is great for many things - puppies, prostitu..I mean finding a job, cars, etc but my favorite craigslist section is the free stuff section. I once got a free armoire that after a few months was able to sell for $250. I also got a great couch in the same run. One of the stranger free ads I've seen was this:
"Have several quaking aspen trees that need a good home. Range from 5 to 20 feet tall. Supposed to be easily transplantable. Bring a shovel. Call Steve @ 970-978-****"
Maybe the 5ft tree can easily be dug up with the shovel, but a 20ft tall tree? Might be bit harder I would think.
Speaking of trees, I just cleaned up the front yard and stacked up all the tree branches in a neat pile. And then it snowed and because it's freakin' May all the trees have leaves and thus I had some nice big branches fall on my nice neat yard. It was kind of cool sticking my head out the door at 2am and hearing all the cracking of branches around the neighborhood. What the hell is up with snow mid may? Maybe God is reminding me I need to get in ass and gear and make my fortune and move away to my tropic beach.
Met local rock band to finish putting together details for bbq & bikini rock show with 4 bands. Apparently I'm going to have to be one of the judges for the bikini contest. Work, work, work...I don't know how I get up in the morning/early afternoon.
Video of the week: Clerk shoots a thief's Junk. YouTube removed the audio but it's subtitled. Notice that not only is the clerk brave enough to pull out a gun and shoot this guy, but she's a got a bad ass line after she shoots him! She's like the James Bond of gas station clerks.
"Have several quaking aspen trees that need a good home. Range from 5 to 20 feet tall. Supposed to be easily transplantable. Bring a shovel. Call Steve @ 970-978-****"
Maybe the 5ft tree can easily be dug up with the shovel, but a 20ft tall tree? Might be bit harder I would think.
Speaking of trees, I just cleaned up the front yard and stacked up all the tree branches in a neat pile. And then it snowed and because it's freakin' May all the trees have leaves and thus I had some nice big branches fall on my nice neat yard. It was kind of cool sticking my head out the door at 2am and hearing all the cracking of branches around the neighborhood. What the hell is up with snow mid may? Maybe God is reminding me I need to get in ass and gear and make my fortune and move away to my tropic beach.
Met local rock band to finish putting together details for bbq & bikini rock show with 4 bands. Apparently I'm going to have to be one of the judges for the bikini contest. Work, work, work...I don't know how I get up in the morning/early afternoon.
Video of the week: Clerk shoots a thief's Junk. YouTube removed the audio but it's subtitled. Notice that not only is the clerk brave enough to pull out a gun and shoot this guy, but she's a got a bad ass line after she shoots him! She's like the James Bond of gas station clerks.
I remain
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Sombrero Sunday
Show got canceled tonight on account that no one remembered it was Mother's day when we booked it and all these metal kids wanted to spend a quiet night with mom instead of rocking out. I suppose it's for the better. I'd get my mom in dinner but she's in Germany so an email will have to suffice. I was thinking of sending her a card saying "Hey you're a Grandma - again!" and photoshopping a picture to make my girlfriend look pregnant. I'm a fan of the pregnancy humor but I think I'm alone on that one so I skipped the card. So no show, Mom is a few thousand miles away, guess it's time for the first ever Sombrero Sunday.
to mom!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Too Much Money?
While my partner was checking the bank account for the business he found a charge for $6.95 that we couldn't account for. After talking to our banker he discovered it was a fee for depositing over $10,000 in cash for the month and the bank charges a counting fee. Now I love Chase Bank but really? We're being charged for putting too much money in the bank? Any time you make a cash deposit they have to count the money anyway and I'm sure they have to double check everything regardless.
It's a bit silly if you ask me. We get charged if we don't have enough money in the bank, we get charged if we put too much in...
Take your six bucks if you want Chase but I no longer feel guilty about taking those suckers you have at the tellers desk.
Take it!
It's a bit silly if you ask me. We get charged if we don't have enough money in the bank, we get charged if we put too much in...
Take your six bucks if you want Chase but I no longer feel guilty about taking those suckers you have at the tellers desk.
Take it!
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Cinco de Mayo
Earlier today I was walking out of my bar when I ran into a friend who was on his way to get a margarita. Why drinking so early in the day? It's Cinco De Mayo that's why! After I left the bar I went to the bank to make a deposit and when I was filling out my deposit slip I had to ask the bank teller what the day was "May 5th - Cinco De Mayo", she said. I've never gotten why everyone in the state's celebrates Mexican Independence day till I learned a few minutes ago that it's not Mexican Independence day, it's the day an army of French bread carrying Frenchmen got beat by the Mexican Army. According to Wikipedia:
"(Cinco de Mayo)... is a holiday held on May 5 that commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely victory over FrenchBattle of Puebla on May 5, 1862, under the leadership of General Ignacio Zaragoza SeguÃn.[2][3] It is celebrated primarily in the state of Puebla and in the United States.[4][5][6][7] While Cinco de Mayo sees limited significance and celebration nationwide in Mexico, the date is observed nationwide in the United States and other locations around the world as a celebration of Mexican heritage and pride.[8]"
The article even states that Cinco de Mayo isn't even really celebrated in Mexico. So half of you are thinking "wait...so all that happened on Cinco de Mayo is that the Mexican Army beat the French? Who hasn't? (Well besides the United States - we've never fought the French)." The other half is too drunk because it's Cinco de Mayo, another half knew all along why Cinco de Mayo is celebrated, and the remainder of you are questioning my math.
But back to Cinco de Mayo. Not to take anything away from the brave Mexican force that beat a larger, better equipped French force but well...they were French. Beating the French in combat is like litter training a cat. You just throw a kitty in the litter box and they pretty much take care of themselves. Maybe a bad analogy but what I'm trying to say is it doesn't take much, you just really have to be there.
Course it didn't matter too much that the Mexican army beat the French at Puebla, the French still ended up occupying Mexico a year later. I guess it's like Nazi's celebrating the defeat of...well the French of World war II.
Of course Cinco de Mayo isn't just about the French getting their ass kicked for the upteenth time - it's about celebrating Mexican culture and heritage. It's also a chance for Americans to practice one of their most sacred cultural rituals - taking a foreign holiday and using it as an excuse to get absolutely wasted. It's just like St. Patrick's Day except no one says "On Cinco de Mayo everyone is Mexican!" Maybe it's a racial thing. Personally I'd rather claim to be Mexican than ginger but that's just me. Either way young adults across American regardless of heritage drink Cuervo and Corona to celebrate MexicanIndepen...whatever. What better way is there to honor the brave men who died on May 5th, 1862, then to be completely ignorant of their struggle and drink margaritas. Speaking of which, I got to finish my marg' and watch more King of the Hill
on Netflix using my Roku
player. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
"(Cinco de Mayo)... is a holiday held on May 5 that commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely victory over FrenchBattle of Puebla on May 5, 1862, under the leadership of General Ignacio Zaragoza SeguÃn.[2][3] It is celebrated primarily in the state of Puebla and in the United States.[4][5][6][7] While Cinco de Mayo sees limited significance and celebration nationwide in Mexico, the date is observed nationwide in the United States and other locations around the world as a celebration of Mexican heritage and pride.[8]"
The article even states that Cinco de Mayo isn't even really celebrated in Mexico. So half of you are thinking "wait...so all that happened on Cinco de Mayo is that the Mexican Army beat the French? Who hasn't? (Well besides the United States - we've never fought the French)." The other half is too drunk because it's Cinco de Mayo, another half knew all along why Cinco de Mayo is celebrated, and the remainder of you are questioning my math.
But back to Cinco de Mayo. Not to take anything away from the brave Mexican force that beat a larger, better equipped French force but well...they were French. Beating the French in combat is like litter training a cat. You just throw a kitty in the litter box and they pretty much take care of themselves. Maybe a bad analogy but what I'm trying to say is it doesn't take much, you just really have to be there.
Course it didn't matter too much that the Mexican army beat the French at Puebla, the French still ended up occupying Mexico a year later. I guess it's like Nazi's celebrating the defeat of...well the French of World war II.
Of course Cinco de Mayo isn't just about the French getting their ass kicked for the upteenth time - it's about celebrating Mexican culture and heritage. It's also a chance for Americans to practice one of their most sacred cultural rituals - taking a foreign holiday and using it as an excuse to get absolutely wasted. It's just like St. Patrick's Day except no one says "On Cinco de Mayo everyone is Mexican!" Maybe it's a racial thing. Personally I'd rather claim to be Mexican than ginger but that's just me. Either way young adults across American regardless of heritage drink Cuervo and Corona to celebrate Mexican
on Netflix using my Roku player. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
A Colon Cleansing Mishap at Hodi's?
If you google Hodi's Half Note and then hit the map tab and check under reviews you'll find this:
Feb 22, 2010
Tim found this and showed it to me on Friday. My first thought was as weird as it sounds, it wouldn't be the strangest thing to happen at Hodi's. And the whole part about the staff laughing and pointing sounds right - we're all well intentioned people but we are kind of dicks. And a grown man defecating in public may be pretty sad, but it's also hilarious. In a sad way.
"Very Rude!
Feb 22, 2010| I had been colon cleansing for a few weeks and had a little accident in the bar, you know, like, I thought I had to fart but it was just watery poop water that came out... and once it starts there's no stopping it from coming out at that point, ya know? Well, being stuck in this predicament I would have expected a slightly more professional attitude from the staff toward the situation... but when I brought it to their attention, all those jerks did was point, and laugh, and point it out to the other customers. VERY unprofessional! Will never hang out there AGAIN!!! |
maps.google.com "
Tim found this and showed it to me on Friday. My first thought was as weird as it sounds, it wouldn't be the strangest thing to happen at Hodi's. And the whole part about the staff laughing and pointing sounds right - we're all well intentioned people but we are kind of dicks. And a grown man defecating in public may be pretty sad, but it's also hilarious. In a sad way.
Turns out it was all a hoax though. The same complaint was made about a few local bars and Best Buy of all places.
The whole thing got me thinking though what garbage the whole cleansing thing is. Here's a passage from Aviva.com:
"In our modern 21st century lifestyle we have the misfortune to be exposed to many toxins on a daily basis through our environment, from overexposure to toxic chemicals at home and at work, and even contained in foods, consumer electronics, cosmetics, many synthetic fabrics, new carpeting, and your new car. Environmental toxins seem to be a prevalent by-product of the frantic lifestyles our technology and economy have forced us to live."
This is cute and all but a certain Latin phrase comes to mind - petitio principii. I found a good definition for it at Dictionary.com
Petito Principii: "a fallacy in reasoning resulting from the assumption of that which in the beginning was set forth to beproved; begging the question."
Firstly, what toxins are we overexposed to and how do they effect our health? How much do we need to be exposed to before they start to effect our health? In one of my favorite books, Bjorn Lomborg's The Skeptical Environmentalist: Measuring the Real State of the World
, Lomborg has a chart of actions which increase your chance of death by .000001 (one-millionth) such as living 150 years within twenty miles of a nuclear power plant or spending 3 hours in a coal mine. So maybe my nice, comfortable t-shirt made from synthetic material is drenching my beautiful pecs in toxins,while my feet absorb toxins from the carpet, I'm building up mercury in my system from all the McDonalds Filet-o-fish, and my shiny new Ipad
sitting in my lap is lowering my sperm count and giving me cancer and all these things (cancer, toxins, etc) are making me feel unhealthy and lethargic and I just need to take some detox pills and have water pumped into my rectum to feel better. Or maybe these things are just increasing my chance of death by .000001. Maybe even .0001. I don't know the answer but no one selling a detox kit do either.
I'm not saying that we aren't exposed to harmful things from our environment - there is mercury in fish and coal miners don't have the cleanest lungs. But if you're trying to sell me this expensive detox kit or treatment you have to be able to tell me what it's clearing out and how it's doing it. Are there any kits out there that can purge mercury from your system after eating too much fish? And speaking of fish they can be pretty good for you. Maybe for a healthy adult the benefit of eating fish a few times a week outweighs the adverse health effects of the tiny amount of mercury you'll absorb from the fish.
The whole thing got me thinking though what garbage the whole cleansing thing is. Here's a passage from Aviva.com:
"In our modern 21st century lifestyle we have the misfortune to be exposed to many toxins on a daily basis through our environment, from overexposure to toxic chemicals at home and at work, and even contained in foods, consumer electronics, cosmetics, many synthetic fabrics, new carpeting, and your new car. Environmental toxins seem to be a prevalent by-product of the frantic lifestyles our technology and economy have forced us to live."
This is cute and all but a certain Latin phrase comes to mind - petitio principii. I found a good definition for it at Dictionary.com
Petito Principii: "a fallacy in reasoning resulting from the assumption of that which in the beginning was set forth to beproved; begging the question."
Firstly, what toxins are we overexposed to and how do they effect our health? How much do we need to be exposed to before they start to effect our health? In one of my favorite books, Bjorn Lomborg's The Skeptical Environmentalist: Measuring the Real State of the World
, Lomborg has a chart of actions which increase your chance of death by .000001 (one-millionth) such as living 150 years within twenty miles of a nuclear power plant or spending 3 hours in a coal mine. So maybe my nice, comfortable t-shirt made from synthetic material is drenching my beautiful pecs in toxins,while my feet absorb toxins from the carpet, I'm building up mercury in my system from all the McDonalds Filet-o-fish, and my shiny new Ipad sitting in my lap is lowering my sperm count and giving me cancer and all these things (cancer, toxins, etc) are making me feel unhealthy and lethargic and I just need to take some detox pills and have water pumped into my rectum to feel better. Or maybe these things are just increasing my chance of death by .000001. Maybe even .0001. I don't know the answer but no one selling a detox kit do either.I'm not saying that we aren't exposed to harmful things from our environment - there is mercury in fish and coal miners don't have the cleanest lungs. But if you're trying to sell me this expensive detox kit or treatment you have to be able to tell me what it's clearing out and how it's doing it. Are there any kits out there that can purge mercury from your system after eating too much fish? And speaking of fish they can be pretty good for you. Maybe for a healthy adult the benefit of eating fish a few times a week outweighs the adverse health effects of the tiny amount of mercury you'll absorb from the fish.
And maybe being exposed to "toxins" from cheap clothes made from synthetic material is better then freezing to death.
Colon cleansing is pretty goofy too. The colon is pretty good at getting shit done, pardon the pun. From Webmd.com:
"Is natural colon cleansing needed? Are bowel movements enough to clear the colon? Or is it true that the only thing that can really clear the colon is a colon cleanser? It is likely the colon doesn't need this kind of help. Here are some reasons why:
- Natural bacteria in the colon detoxify food wastes.
- The liver also neutralizes toxins.
- Mucus membranes in the colon keep unwanted substances from reentering the blood and tissues.
- The colon sheds old cells about every three days, preventing a buildup of harmful material.
- The normal number of bowel movements varies from person to person. It may be as often as a few times a day or as little as a few times a week.
- Increasing the number of bowel movements doesn't improve weight loss. That's because the body absorbs most calories before they reach the large intestine."
"The body actually has a massive overcapacity to dispose of toxins. 'As for the need to cleanse the colon, it is constantly cleansing itself by renewing the mucus layer that protects the colon wall from being exposed to toxins. So, flushing pints of water through it with things like colonic irrigation is one of the more damaging things you can do to it."
When people lose weight from cleanses it usually has something to do with the fact during this cleanse they're cutting out unhealthy foods, restricting caloric intake and taking in more fiber. Weird how that might cause you to lose weight! Even stranger, somethings I don't eat till 5 in the afternoon, have a bedtime that ranges from 1am - 5am, work 50-60 hours a week, don't workout near enough and for some reason I don't always feel so hot. Maybe I should detox. Or maybe I need to keep a consistent sleep schedule, eat healthy meals at set times every day, and workout half hour to hour a day.
Of course it's a lot easier to pay $50-60 for some hippie pseudo science created detox plan than to make meaningful healthy changes to my lifestyle. And that's the kicker. Despite there being no real science to back this stuff up, people go for it because it's a quick easy fix.
Yep unfortunately the only way to be healthy is to live healthy. I'm not too good at that myself but I'm not sticking a hose up my butt to try to make up for a lack of sleep and high fiber breakfast cereal.
And finally I have to mention that my girlfriend was able to get a Best Buy credit card and helped me replace my laptop that just died with an Ipad.
. 
It's pretty niffty, I can do inventory at work without having to print out ten pages of excel spread sheets, email bands and set up shows, even stream netflix at the airport. The apple book store has a bunch of free books too. Totally worth the cancer - even ball cancer.
(For those of you who have cleansed and had some weird stuff come out of you go to http://rawveg.info/coloncleanse.html to learn about why that happens. Also if you find some evidence to support detox and cleansing hit me up - I'm all about the magic pill. That's why I played the lottery so much in the past!)
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Snow in late April?
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Real Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja Book
A customer brought me REAL Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja Book
a few nights ago. She thought I'd appreciate it and I do. It may be crude, infantile, and in no way factual there are still a few laughs to be had. Example:
a few nights ago. She thought I'd appreciate it and I do. It may be crude, infantile, and in no way factual there are still a few laughs to be had. Example:"Ninja's hang out in dojos (A lot). Dojos are kinda like bars where ninjas go to relax and/or meet babes."
It's the kind of bad you can enjoy especially after a few beers much like God's gift to cinema - Showdown in Little Tokyo
:
:(Sidenote: Dolph Lundgren is a gigantic Swedish man standing well over 7ft tall so jumping over a low riding car carrying short Japanese people really isn't quite amazing as one would think.)
Had a few great shows last week one of which was Chali 2na. Only got half the crowd we needed but you wouldn't know it listening to Chali 2na. One of the coolest nicest guys (hell the whole band was cool) we've had through Hodi's and played his set like he was in front of a sold out crowd. This is quite a contrast to someone like Anthony B who wouldn't even get up on stage and when a fan wrote him and called him out complained about how the rasta man has been enslaved by the white man for....yada yada. Anyway, like I said Chali 2na is a stand up guy, made sure to hang with the fans before and after the show, was very humble and a damn good act to boot. The openers were all good too, Heatbox
is one of my favorite acts to come through Hodi's. We lost a fair bit of money on the show but thats how things go sometimes.I'm off to practice my Japanese, got a childrens book from my tutor today.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
I'm freakin' beat
It's been a hell of a long weekend. Bar made good money though and we didn't have too much trouble. It's been a good month so far. I am exhausted but I feel good knowing I've got a few relatively easy days coming up. Taxes are getting done, I got plenty of work to do but after getting through this weekend things don't seem too bad. Going to go see Kick-Ass Tuesday with the woman, been looking forward to it for a while now.
Got money to deposit in the bank, I'm about to drink a beer and watch a bad movie, the woman is in bed with the dogs, and we've kept the doors open and drinks pouring for another day. Life could be worse.
Till Tomorrow...
Got money to deposit in the bank, I'm about to drink a beer and watch a bad movie, the woman is in bed with the dogs, and we've kept the doors open and drinks pouring for another day. Life could be worse.
Till Tomorrow...
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Great Commercial
Sitting round the house firming up show details, and working out. Saw this on TV and had to share.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
my doodle and was today a good day?
I haven't blogged for awhile, I need to get better about doing it every day. Someday's though, even when things are going right there just isn't much to talk about. I get lucky now and then when some idiot in Boulder has his energy crystals mailed to the wrong address but some days are just boring.
Today was one of those days. I got a bit of work done, had a good jujitsu class, maybe broke a student's toe when I threw them (honestly I think he broke it - I didn't step on it, it just got caught on the mats), made a walmart trip and got a blender with the girl, and watched bit of Seinfeld while studying Japanese. I worked out a little today but not quite enough. So in some respects today was good, I did almost everything I want to do everyday - exercise, jujitsu, work, and got some healthy food, didn't eat out or spend money I didn't have to (well except the blender). It doesn't feel like enough though and I have a hard time not getting frustrated. There is just so much more I could be doing and I get a bit depressed when I feel as though I wasted a bit of the day.
While studying I came across a doodle I drew so I took a picture of it and cleaned it up with photoshop to make it look more artistic and less like it was drawn by the kid who passed art by the skin of his teeth. I wish I could draw I think it would be a good creative outlet. If I could take all my ideas and put them to paper I think it'd be a nice release. Instead I get an overwhelming feeling in my head much like a can of coke must feel like when it's been shaken.
Strangely enough sometimes the cure for restlessness is sleep. It's a good way to reset. I leave you with my doodle. Prints are available for $1,000 a piece and a certificate of almost authenticity and poor taste. The bridge represents a very basic way of teaching jujitsu. Set and go, set and go, set and go. I'd like to think thats deep, instead it's just bit silly.
Today was one of those days. I got a bit of work done, had a good jujitsu class, maybe broke a student's toe when I threw them (honestly I think he broke it - I didn't step on it, it just got caught on the mats), made a walmart trip and got a blender with the girl, and watched bit of Seinfeld while studying Japanese. I worked out a little today but not quite enough. So in some respects today was good, I did almost everything I want to do everyday - exercise, jujitsu, work, and got some healthy food, didn't eat out or spend money I didn't have to (well except the blender). It doesn't feel like enough though and I have a hard time not getting frustrated. There is just so much more I could be doing and I get a bit depressed when I feel as though I wasted a bit of the day.
While studying I came across a doodle I drew so I took a picture of it and cleaned it up with photoshop to make it look more artistic and less like it was drawn by the kid who passed art by the skin of his teeth. I wish I could draw I think it would be a good creative outlet. If I could take all my ideas and put them to paper I think it'd be a nice release. Instead I get an overwhelming feeling in my head much like a can of coke must feel like when it's been shaken.
Strangely enough sometimes the cure for restlessness is sleep. It's a good way to reset. I leave you with my doodle. Prints are available for $1,000 a piece and a certificate of almost authenticity and poor taste. The bridge represents a very basic way of teaching jujitsu. Set and go, set and go, set and go. I'd like to think thats deep, instead it's just bit silly.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Slow Money
This weekend was pretty damn good. We made a lot of money, it was the FocoMX event this weekend. Close to 200 bands at a dozen or so bars and venues around town for two days. It did really well for us last year and was also quite good this year. There is a base amount of money we need to make every week to have a good month. We made our weeks money in 3 days (Fri-Sun).
What was interesting is that because we had the FocoMX event Friday and Saturday is that our doors were open at 6 instead of 8. We were pouring drinks at 630 instead of the usual 930-10. We never got really busy either night but we had great nights, it just goes to show you how important the early money is, if you can pour an extra 100-300 a night because people show up earlier than they would for most shows it really adds up. We can't get people in early every night but as I think of new ways to make the bar money I'll have to look into taking advantage of times we can do that.
I was cleaning up my desktop and found a few pictures of foreclosed houses in Japan I was looking at. I can't afford one now but I still like to look and found a few places I liked. This one had a pretty low minium bid and was really cool looking. It was pretty small house on a small plot of land but it's got a very isolated and unique look to it.
This next one has been my favorite so far. Decent sized plot of land, has 2 additional building, looks fairly big, and isn't around any other houses.
Lots of work today, but I'm excited because I'm feeling bit healthier and I'm ready to get back to work. I've got a pretty decent amount of shows to get booked and a strategy to develop and pursue for summer. Really looking forward to it.
Till next time.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
blehh....
Tonight was a good night. We weren't ever really slammed but it was consistent all night so we made good money. The only problem I had was my throat is still killing me. Trying to talk over the music to customers was not happening.
Going to be a busy weekend, just too much to do and not enough time to do it. Have to hit the bank early tomorrow, got a meeting, and early work again at 5. Class Sunday and early show Sunday night. Inventory Monday and much work to get done. I might get a break Tuesday.
Blehh....I'm sleeping all day Tuesday.
Going to be a busy weekend, just too much to do and not enough time to do it. Have to hit the bank early tomorrow, got a meeting, and early work again at 5. Class Sunday and early show Sunday night. Inventory Monday and much work to get done. I might get a break Tuesday.
Blehh....I'm sleeping all day Tuesday.
Friday, April 9, 2010
FocoMX
FocoMX tonight and tomorrow, like 180 local bands playing all the different bars and venues. Should be good money for both me and the bar. Looking forward too it. Can only do a quick update though, too much to do!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Mai Nichi Ichi Nichi Ju - Every day all day long
I remember in the few weeks before I got the business back telling my employees that I'd figure something out and save the bar. From time to time they'd ask me how things were going and I'd tell them don't worry about it, I said I'd take care of it. It was rough, not only did I have to find an investor but I had to find someone who would keep the business as a venue, keep my employees, and still have a spot for me. I didn't (and still don't) have any money, and my best sales pitch was "I'm pretty sure I can do this."
It was a hell of a lot pressure - I didn't want to to let my employees down and I didn't want to lose my bar. And to make things worse even if I did get the bar back I'd still have to turn the business around and make it a profitable.
I had a few moments where I thought to myself I should just give up and let it go. There was a buyer from New York who was ready to buy Hodi's. I could walk away find another job and be done with it. I'd still have some debt to pay off but I probably could find some decent work, I had a year's experience of owning and operating a bar, that should count for something right?
I stuck it out though and was able to find new partners and cash and kept the doors open. It was a hell of a feat. But sometimes I question whether it was worth it. I questioned it this morning. I was tired, sick, and sitting at the bar working on filling out forms and taking care of bills, the usual thing. It was early and I was grumpy.
The day got better though, I confirmed a few show details, all our deliveries for the day came in early, had a good talk with one of my partners, and got to leave the bar earlier then usual. It wasn't till I almost got home it hit me why I do what I do. It's not fun being part of a struggling business, but it is fun making a struggling business a success. As Truman Capote once said "Failure is the condiment that gives success it's flavor." And we've had plenty of failure at Hodi's. I'm due a big bite of a metaphoric hot dog covered in cheese, chile and ketchup. And for the all the dumb, drunk, asshole customers, there are so many more who are good people just out to have a good time - a great many of whom I'm happy to see every time they come in. Not only are there many more good customers who I enjoy seeing but they're good enough people that even if it were an equal ratio it'd still be worth working and owning Hodi's. The same goes for our industry people - our liquor and beer reps, etc, lot of good people.
So I've got a business that I get to decide whether we fail or succeed, I drink for free (and can have a beer at work), and most of the time I enjoy the company of great customers and an equally great staff. We have a lot of fun at work. As bad as things can be sometimes, I got things pretty good.
So I got a business who's fate is going to be decided by me and that requires me to hang out with a bunch of very good people, and I drink for free. Things aren't going to be easy for a very long time if ever. But it's not that hard either. Just got to keep at it. One of my favorite phrases I learned in Japanese "mai nichi, ichi nichi juu" - every day all day long. Just got to keep at it.
It was a hell of a lot pressure - I didn't want to to let my employees down and I didn't want to lose my bar. And to make things worse even if I did get the bar back I'd still have to turn the business around and make it a profitable.
I had a few moments where I thought to myself I should just give up and let it go. There was a buyer from New York who was ready to buy Hodi's. I could walk away find another job and be done with it. I'd still have some debt to pay off but I probably could find some decent work, I had a year's experience of owning and operating a bar, that should count for something right?
I stuck it out though and was able to find new partners and cash and kept the doors open. It was a hell of a feat. But sometimes I question whether it was worth it. I questioned it this morning. I was tired, sick, and sitting at the bar working on filling out forms and taking care of bills, the usual thing. It was early and I was grumpy.
The day got better though, I confirmed a few show details, all our deliveries for the day came in early, had a good talk with one of my partners, and got to leave the bar earlier then usual. It wasn't till I almost got home it hit me why I do what I do. It's not fun being part of a struggling business, but it is fun making a struggling business a success. As Truman Capote once said "Failure is the condiment that gives success it's flavor." And we've had plenty of failure at Hodi's. I'm due a big bite of a metaphoric hot dog covered in cheese, chile and ketchup. And for the all the dumb, drunk, asshole customers, there are so many more who are good people just out to have a good time - a great many of whom I'm happy to see every time they come in. Not only are there many more good customers who I enjoy seeing but they're good enough people that even if it were an equal ratio it'd still be worth working and owning Hodi's. The same goes for our industry people - our liquor and beer reps, etc, lot of good people.
So I've got a business that I get to decide whether we fail or succeed, I drink for free (and can have a beer at work), and most of the time I enjoy the company of great customers and an equally great staff. We have a lot of fun at work. As bad as things can be sometimes, I got things pretty good.
So I got a business who's fate is going to be decided by me and that requires me to hang out with a bunch of very good people, and I drink for free. Things aren't going to be easy for a very long time if ever. But it's not that hard either. Just got to keep at it. One of my favorite phrases I learned in Japanese "mai nichi, ichi nichi juu" - every day all day long. Just got to keep at it.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Mai Nichi Ichi Nichi Ju - Every day all day long
It's been a few days since I blogged so I thought I better throw something out there. It's been a tough few days I've been a bit sick but it's not all terrible. I got my Roku SD Player today and hooked it up. It's a little box that you plug into your TV and then you can watch Netflix on your TV. It was $79 bucks but I'm still saving money. By canceling my $20 a month Blockbuster membership I'll save $132 a year plus another $30 in gas a year by not driving to Blockbuster. So I should save $70 the first year after the Roku Player and bit more every year after.
In workout news I think I'm going to add squats, crunchs, pivots and shuffles to my workout routine. The shuffles and pivots aren't much of a workout but they're jujitsu movements I can and should practice everyday. I still feel very tired every day but I also feel a bit stronger.
Finally in terms of making money I'm not where I need to be but I think I've been able to clear things up a bit and I know have a better plan in place. I have six projects outside the bar that I'd like to make happen and that I believe will make me decent money. However all of these projects require capital to make happen. I believe $10,000 would be sufficient to get things going. That means I need to put away $28 a day in the dream jar for a year to come up with the $10,000 I need. It's not a whole lot of cash but I'm not going to find it under my couch every day for the next year. How to accomplish this I don't know but the more I can lower my living cost the easier it'll be. I can start there.
Well time to study - till tomorrow.
today and hooked it up. It's a little box that you plug into your TV and then you can watch Netflix on your TV. It was $79 bucks but I'm still saving money. By canceling my $20 a month Blockbuster membership I'll save $132 a year plus another $30 in gas a year by not driving to Blockbuster. So I should save $70 the first year after the Roku Player and bit more every year after. In workout news I think I'm going to add squats, crunchs, pivots and shuffles to my workout routine. The shuffles and pivots aren't much of a workout but they're jujitsu movements I can and should practice everyday. I still feel very tired every day but I also feel a bit stronger.
Finally in terms of making money I'm not where I need to be but I think I've been able to clear things up a bit and I know have a better plan in place. I have six projects outside the bar that I'd like to make happen and that I believe will make me decent money. However all of these projects require capital to make happen. I believe $10,000 would be sufficient to get things going. That means I need to put away $28 a day in the dream jar for a year to come up with the $10,000 I need. It's not a whole lot of cash but I'm not going to find it under my couch every day for the next year. How to accomplish this I don't know but the more I can lower my living cost the easier it'll be. I can start there.
Well time to study - till tomorrow.
Friday, April 2, 2010
Dogs and Sprinklers and juggling
For your enjoyment, the reason I can't water the lawn with the dogs around
And just cause I been on a juggling kick, Here I am juggling 5 balls
And just cause I been on a juggling kick, Here I am juggling 5 balls
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
1000 hits on the blog, 420 pushups
So yesterday I got all kinds of stuff done and it was great. I didn't have to go to work either so I could spend some time cleaning up the house, writing, and studying Japanese. I opened the back up of my 2nd year Japanese book and spent 2 hours memorizing words. I also met Miho-san for an hour so I got a lot of studying done. I also did a hell of a lot of finger push ups - 420 over the course of the day. I even did 40 straight after I passed the 200 mark. I was going for 1000 for the day to celebrate my blog passing 1000 hits but I didn't leave myself enough time. I think I could do it but I need a whole day to myself to get it done. Maybe I'll try to next week. Not today though that's for damn sure. I wasn't sore at all after doing sets of 10 finger push ups most of the day and thought that had I had time I could have hit 1000 easy since I wasn't sore. Today though my chest, arms, and even legs are sore from all the push ups.
Looking forward to taking care of some projects tonight
Looking forward to taking care of some projects tonight
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